I want you to meet Mr. Rubber Ducky, and Mrs. Fabulous Flamingo.
Play is the air that keeps their love inflated.
Without it, both partners would deflate emotionally and feel stuck in a flat relationship.
Dr. Gottman’s research highlights that 70% of a relationship’s satisfaction is determined by the couple’s friendship. This research has been done for thousands of couples, and is true for both men and women.
The couples who found ways to play together at every stage of their relationship stayed together. The couples who didn’t eventually separated or endured an unhappy relationship.
Play makes emotional connection easy and enjoyable. It invites both partners to open up emotionally. Play is a form of intimacy, because it requires an intimate knowledge of your partner’s inner world. A playful friendship with one another creates a strong relationship.
Maybe you grew up struggling with the concept of play. I know I did. I always felt that it came secondary to winning prizes or achievements.
Your play style is a reflection of the emotional security we were offered as kids. This is also true for adults. Couples who create an emotionally secure relationship are often more playful than insecure couples.